Okay it has been a year since I started going gluten and fiber free. Happy Year to me. I have gone through the stages of death to food.
First denial, this truly can not be happening to me. I have aged to what and never new I couldn't eat certain food.
Second, anger, oh was I mad, especially when I left the store the first time in not being able to negotiate even buying my groceries. I was pissed.
Third, negotiating, I thought surely this doesn't mean everything that the doctor is saying, oh boy did I get in trouble when I started eating the wrong foods.
Fourth, depression, everytime there was a party, or an event at work, I would get really depressed that I would never be able to eat the foods I loved again.
Fifth, acceptance, yes it has taken me almost a year to accept this situation and now I understand it, I accept it. Do I trip up and have flour every once in awhile, you bet, but I always regret it. Do I eat fiber when I know it is going to hurt me, yes, and now I have learned.
I think the hardest and the most unaccepting was the fiber free. I knew I sort of did this to myself, by unknowingly taking tylenol too much. I thought I was safe and I really didn't have an idea that I was ruining my stomach. At one point I could eat anything and I felt really lucky I didn't have allergies or any other thing stopping what I really wanted in food. Now if I had only known would I have done anything different, I don't think anyone does anything different, I believe all of us feel we are immuned to it as long as we don't hurt, at that point it is way too late.
This year has been more of a negotiating, like I said until it hurts us. Since I knew I couldn't eat flour, I negotiated by eating too much with fiber in my stomach that it wouldn't take it. Several times during the year I find myself going back to square one of no fiber in the diet when my stomach would hurt way too much and I knew I was just hurting myself, but I thought if I gave up flour I need something, there goes that negotiation again.
When I was so sick I had lost about 20 lbs. and felt really good in my clothes and just my all around health even though I really wasn't eating anything. Once I went off of flour I started, again negotiating, if I can't have cakes and cookies, I can have candy, and oh did I eat candy. I have gained back that 20 lbs. and more and now regret every bite.
St. Patrick's Day is my funniest holiday. You don't have to do anything, but enjoy it. Good food, good drinks and just a celebration of friends and fun. Will I be eating cornbeef and cabbage, probably not the cabbage and a mild serving of cornbeef. You can negotiate your life to be better or feel sick, and I have chosen to feel better. Happy St. Patrick's Day to all my friends and family and enjoy all the good things in life as long as it doesn't hurt you.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
Laughing Pioneer Woman
Okay if you wanted to get away from your problems and just have a little fun with your friend, you would go with her to a book signing of Pioneer Woman's new book " Ree Drummond was just as cute as she is on her blog. I know you are suppose to write like you experience, think and talk, but it was almost like her blog had started narrating in first person. It was weird.
After listening to her answer questions, Pam and I had time to just relax and talk while we waited our turn to go up and have her sign our copy of the book. We laughed and laughed. It was such a fun and relaxing evening and it didn't seem like either one of us had any physical problems. I decided you need more of those days when life is light and unwanting of anything necessary.
I know that my friend is reading this, and if anyone in spite of all her physical ailments takes days with the upmost oppotomism it is my friend, Pam. You never know when you or the ones that you are around's time is up, but it takes these kind of nights to remember that you have really true friends out there and you need not to think of your ailments but cherish the moments you can laugh.
Thank you my friend.
After listening to her answer questions, Pam and I had time to just relax and talk while we waited our turn to go up and have her sign our copy of the book. We laughed and laughed. It was such a fun and relaxing evening and it didn't seem like either one of us had any physical problems. I decided you need more of those days when life is light and unwanting of anything necessary.
I know that my friend is reading this, and if anyone in spite of all her physical ailments takes days with the upmost oppotomism it is my friend, Pam. You never know when you or the ones that you are around's time is up, but it takes these kind of nights to remember that you have really true friends out there and you need not to think of your ailments but cherish the moments you can laugh.
Thank you my friend.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Star Trek Therapy
Star Trek was one of my many favorite shows when I was a kid. At my age I was really a baby when that series was on, JK. You would think that after all of this time that Capt. Kirk would be there for me, I was there for him everyday. You would think after all of this time that medical science would come up with better ways of treating patients. I remember that ship would have a simple medical scanner that would go over your body, you would lay on a bed and some how miraculously become healed. THAT'S WHAT I WANT.
After coming back to work and talking to several co-workers regarding almost the same symptoms, I cancelled my acupuncturist appointment and is heading for destinations that I really don't want to be in, back into the medical rat race.
I talked with a coworker and she said she spent 5 years, 3 doctors, 1 acupuncturist (including my acupuncturist), a masseuse, and many physical workouts to have one final doctor tell her that it was carpel tunnel syndrome and the only thing that would help is an operation.
After dealing with my gastro doctor, I realized this world is turning into a medical wasteland. The physicians join these group organizations that have a million doctors in them, with a million more staff. You never really talk to the doctor, you don't even talk to the physician's assistant, you get the staff that basically barely knows what your symptoms are, little alone the cure. They don't read the file before calling you, and they have this pat answer for everything. IT DRIVES ME CRAZY.
I shouldn't complain since I work for one of those large company's with a million attorneys, with a million more staff supporting them, and we have those pat answers for everything. Our attorneys specialize usually in one field of law, they no NOTHING, and I mean nothing regarding any other field of law, which is good and bad for the client. You get the top expertise for what the client directly wants, but heaven forbid if they sway from the topic, because then that attorney is swimming to find the next expert for the next subject.
I guess it's better than having the country hick doctor or attorney assisting you when their knowledge is even more narrow. Oh well.
So what did I do, I took the young and stupid route, I came to work, went directly to my computer, plugged into Youtube and put in Carpel Tunnel exercises. Zasam, a million vidoes of physical therapy at my finger. Update on self-diagnosing, self-physical therapy, and self-treatment of my ailments later.
After coming back to work and talking to several co-workers regarding almost the same symptoms, I cancelled my acupuncturist appointment and is heading for destinations that I really don't want to be in, back into the medical rat race.
I talked with a coworker and she said she spent 5 years, 3 doctors, 1 acupuncturist (including my acupuncturist), a masseuse, and many physical workouts to have one final doctor tell her that it was carpel tunnel syndrome and the only thing that would help is an operation.
After dealing with my gastro doctor, I realized this world is turning into a medical wasteland. The physicians join these group organizations that have a million doctors in them, with a million more staff. You never really talk to the doctor, you don't even talk to the physician's assistant, you get the staff that basically barely knows what your symptoms are, little alone the cure. They don't read the file before calling you, and they have this pat answer for everything. IT DRIVES ME CRAZY.
I shouldn't complain since I work for one of those large company's with a million attorneys, with a million more staff supporting them, and we have those pat answers for everything. Our attorneys specialize usually in one field of law, they no NOTHING, and I mean nothing regarding any other field of law, which is good and bad for the client. You get the top expertise for what the client directly wants, but heaven forbid if they sway from the topic, because then that attorney is swimming to find the next expert for the next subject.
I guess it's better than having the country hick doctor or attorney assisting you when their knowledge is even more narrow. Oh well.
So what did I do, I took the young and stupid route, I came to work, went directly to my computer, plugged into Youtube and put in Carpel Tunnel exercises. Zasam, a million vidoes of physical therapy at my finger. Update on self-diagnosing, self-physical therapy, and self-treatment of my ailments later.
Monday, January 31, 2011
On With The Adventure
Okay it has been quite sometime since I wrote regarding my arm. Yes I did agree with my daughter to see Dr. Ding, the acupuncturist. I think I am pretty open minded when it comes to medicine. If someone can change my attitude or attributes towards my physical health I am game. It has to be better than surgery. Stupidly I might have waited too long between agreeing and actually seeing Dr. Ding. I love saying that, Dr. Ding. It really sounds like he knows his stuff. Dr. Ding, Dr. Ding, Dr. Ding.
I had a moment when mind is stupidly over matter. I had adult children coming and going one weekend when it had been snowing at my house. My husband was working 48 hours almost straight so he had no time to snow shovel anything and did anyone of those adult children say, "I can do it for you." So after a very frustrating weekend and trying to hint (as my psychiatrist says, don't hint just say full on, its better for communication) I took matters in my own hands. I thought lucky for me the snow was fluffy light and hopefully won't do too much damage. Oh was I so wrong after lifting a shovel approximately 100 times repetitively within 20 minutes.
The arm didn't seem to hurt too much the day after, I thought maybe my arm is getting stronger and I just need to work out and stay with it. The next day I felt like I had been hit with a truck, maybe not even hit, but ran over several times in one particular area.
I immediately called Dr. Ding and amazingly he could get me right in. I thought this little Chinese doctor must not be too busy if he can get me right in. That was another misnomer.
The day of the appointment I was slowly moving around in my office when everyone asked what I was going to the doctor for (of course thinking it was a western doctor with actual medicine, Oxycontin would have done quite well), I explained I was going to an acupuncturist for the first time. They all looked at me quite weird, but I explained that this doctor couldn't make it any worst and hopefully make it better for less money than a western doctor. My boss turned to me and told me that I probably have carpel tunnel in my neck and arm and would either have to have physical therapy and/or several operations. Well then definitely this acupuncturist was going to be a lot less than operations and hopefully a lot less pain.
Painfully driving myself to Dr. Ding, I got on the elevator to go down to his office and could smell the strong Mentholatum ointment that my kids had bought me to relieve pain. I knew I was hopefully going down to my solution. I walked in knowing my appointment was in 10 min and there sat 3 patients. I forgot I was dealing with a china man. Chinese have no qualms of thinking they can over pack their schedule to meet there pocket needs. I just hoped he wasn't going to overpack my level of irritation.
All 3 patients went in quite quickly and he ushered me in for consultation. After approximately 30 needles were put in, a heat lamp, a nice little snooze, and 30 mins went by I was supposedly cured half way. He told me that I would need 2 to 3 treatments and that all of my pain would be gone and never return. Man am I holding him to his word on that.
A footnote to this appointment is that I went home and was in the worst pain I had ever been in with regards to my arm in months. I either was lathering myself up with Dr. Ding ointment or was sitting in the jaquzzi or heating pad for the entire weekend. I have said at least once in my blog it sucks to get old. If it is the last thing I do (and it maybe the last thing I do) I am going to get a handle on this and try to be in the best physical condition ever. Three days later I will be having another Dr. Ding appointment. The story continues. . .
I had a moment when mind is stupidly over matter. I had adult children coming and going one weekend when it had been snowing at my house. My husband was working 48 hours almost straight so he had no time to snow shovel anything and did anyone of those adult children say, "I can do it for you." So after a very frustrating weekend and trying to hint (as my psychiatrist says, don't hint just say full on, its better for communication) I took matters in my own hands. I thought lucky for me the snow was fluffy light and hopefully won't do too much damage. Oh was I so wrong after lifting a shovel approximately 100 times repetitively within 20 minutes.
The arm didn't seem to hurt too much the day after, I thought maybe my arm is getting stronger and I just need to work out and stay with it. The next day I felt like I had been hit with a truck, maybe not even hit, but ran over several times in one particular area.
I immediately called Dr. Ding and amazingly he could get me right in. I thought this little Chinese doctor must not be too busy if he can get me right in. That was another misnomer.
The day of the appointment I was slowly moving around in my office when everyone asked what I was going to the doctor for (of course thinking it was a western doctor with actual medicine, Oxycontin would have done quite well), I explained I was going to an acupuncturist for the first time. They all looked at me quite weird, but I explained that this doctor couldn't make it any worst and hopefully make it better for less money than a western doctor. My boss turned to me and told me that I probably have carpel tunnel in my neck and arm and would either have to have physical therapy and/or several operations. Well then definitely this acupuncturist was going to be a lot less than operations and hopefully a lot less pain.
Painfully driving myself to Dr. Ding, I got on the elevator to go down to his office and could smell the strong Mentholatum ointment that my kids had bought me to relieve pain. I knew I was hopefully going down to my solution. I walked in knowing my appointment was in 10 min and there sat 3 patients. I forgot I was dealing with a china man. Chinese have no qualms of thinking they can over pack their schedule to meet there pocket needs. I just hoped he wasn't going to overpack my level of irritation.
All 3 patients went in quite quickly and he ushered me in for consultation. After approximately 30 needles were put in, a heat lamp, a nice little snooze, and 30 mins went by I was supposedly cured half way. He told me that I would need 2 to 3 treatments and that all of my pain would be gone and never return. Man am I holding him to his word on that.
A footnote to this appointment is that I went home and was in the worst pain I had ever been in with regards to my arm in months. I either was lathering myself up with Dr. Ding ointment or was sitting in the jaquzzi or heating pad for the entire weekend. I have said at least once in my blog it sucks to get old. If it is the last thing I do (and it maybe the last thing I do) I am going to get a handle on this and try to be in the best physical condition ever. Three days later I will be having another Dr. Ding appointment. The story continues. . .
Friday, January 21, 2011
Slapping The Child Around
Getting older (not old) has made me realized that things start breaking down. My eyesight has changed, my skin has got sagger, my boobs have started dragging on the floor, and believe me I originally didn't have enough boobs to consider them to be boobs, so that is quite a feat for my boobs to be dragging on a table little alone on the floor. I have got a little thicker around not just the middle and of course my insides are all a jumble. I have been having problems with my right shoulder. I would like to think it is from slapping a child around into being better than me, but I pretty much have only done that mentally, mind games with your children are actually an art. Between the guilt and the obligation factor you can go along way.
My daughter has been seeing an acupuncturist, so guess what she talked me into seeing him as well. He surely couldn't hurt the situation any more than it is now, could he.
It brings me back to the a trip to China that I had, all of us woman thought a Chinese massage would be just perfect at the end of a very long day of traveling. Were we wrong!!! You wouldn't think small little Chinese women could torture you to do death in a matter of minutes. It also reminded me of being on the Yangtze when we went to the Chinese medicine class on the ship. The Chinese doctor truly looked like he was Jerry Lewis off of the Nutty Professor, buck teeth, lab coat and the messed up hair. It was hysterical.
I hope at the end of this appointment I am not wishing I didn't just slap a few more children around with the left hand so that I would be balanced and in shape. Just kidding readers. Watch for my update from the deep dark recesses of the mystical Chinese dungeons, actually a spa in Park City.
My daughter has been seeing an acupuncturist, so guess what she talked me into seeing him as well. He surely couldn't hurt the situation any more than it is now, could he.
It brings me back to the a trip to China that I had, all of us woman thought a Chinese massage would be just perfect at the end of a very long day of traveling. Were we wrong!!! You wouldn't think small little Chinese women could torture you to do death in a matter of minutes. It also reminded me of being on the Yangtze when we went to the Chinese medicine class on the ship. The Chinese doctor truly looked like he was Jerry Lewis off of the Nutty Professor, buck teeth, lab coat and the messed up hair. It was hysterical.
I hope at the end of this appointment I am not wishing I didn't just slap a few more children around with the left hand so that I would be balanced and in shape. Just kidding readers. Watch for my update from the deep dark recesses of the mystical Chinese dungeons, actually a spa in Park City.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Deep Fry
My husband sometimes can come up with the greatest ideas. At the great age of what, he has realized to listen to me is better than not and so there were several things under the Christmas Tree that screamed at me once I opened them, "HE IS LISTENING." One of the items was a deep fat fryer. It kind of threw me off when I opened it because I haven't been able to eat anything from a deep fat fryer since I went gluten free. Most everything has flour or bread crumbs wrapped around it.
Several months ago my husband and I went to one of our favorite restaurants "Spin Cafe." When we got there I realized that I wouldn't be able to eat any more of their wonderful onion rings. It made me sad. I went ahead and asked if they had a gluten free menu, which they did. When I got it, there in the middle it said "onion rings." I couldn't believe my eyes, I thought they were playing tricks on me. When I asked the waitress she said they are not made with wheat flour. I said "no way." She said, "oh so way." I asked her if they don't use flour what do they use which initiated her to go ask the chef. The chef told her he dips the onion rings in buttermilk and then into rice flour. I said to myself, I have rice flour, I can do this one day at the house.
Shortly after my daughter and I went to Thai restaurant. Not being too hip on Thai food, I know my love is for Chinese food which I have to specially cook for myself gluten free, I wasn't happy in going anyway, but I remember most Thai food have rice noodles and I thought I could do that. When I got there, there at the top of the menu was calamari specifically in Tapioca Flour. I was ecstatic. I haven't had calamari it seemed like in so long. It was wonderful.
I always wanted a deep fat fryer in my countertop like Paula Dean has on her show, but when I went gluten free there is no need to think I should need one. So when I got my deep fat fryer I realized I am in business.
Who said going gluten free you lose weight. That is so much crap. Now with my own deep fat fryer, not that I am going to be cooking every night, but I am sure just that little added fat in my diet will not be good. Who cares, for the things we have to sacrifice (i.e. cakes, cookies...), a little fat in my diet will be just fine.
Several months ago my husband and I went to one of our favorite restaurants "Spin Cafe." When we got there I realized that I wouldn't be able to eat any more of their wonderful onion rings. It made me sad. I went ahead and asked if they had a gluten free menu, which they did. When I got it, there in the middle it said "onion rings." I couldn't believe my eyes, I thought they were playing tricks on me. When I asked the waitress she said they are not made with wheat flour. I said "no way." She said, "oh so way." I asked her if they don't use flour what do they use which initiated her to go ask the chef. The chef told her he dips the onion rings in buttermilk and then into rice flour. I said to myself, I have rice flour, I can do this one day at the house.
Shortly after my daughter and I went to Thai restaurant. Not being too hip on Thai food, I know my love is for Chinese food which I have to specially cook for myself gluten free, I wasn't happy in going anyway, but I remember most Thai food have rice noodles and I thought I could do that. When I got there, there at the top of the menu was calamari specifically in Tapioca Flour. I was ecstatic. I haven't had calamari it seemed like in so long. It was wonderful.
I always wanted a deep fat fryer in my countertop like Paula Dean has on her show, but when I went gluten free there is no need to think I should need one. So when I got my deep fat fryer I realized I am in business.
Who said going gluten free you lose weight. That is so much crap. Now with my own deep fat fryer, not that I am going to be cooking every night, but I am sure just that little added fat in my diet will not be good. Who cares, for the things we have to sacrifice (i.e. cakes, cookies...), a little fat in my diet will be just fine.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Guard of the Goodies
This is my first Christmas that I have had to go through being gluten free. I have a new title. Everyone in the office has soon realized that I won't over endulge in the office goodies since 99% of them have gluten in them. So where do they end up, at my desk.
A year ago if someone told me they were going to put gluten bread, cakes, and cookies in front of me I would have told them they were torturing me. Today, it seems so normal to give up so much. It actually makes me appreciate the fact that I am not adding all those extra calories on my behind.
Oh believe me I have found all different ways around that gluten torture to enjoy gluten free treats. I haven't lost much of any weight, in fact sometimes I wonder if my body has really readjusted and those calories I do eat are now just adding up some other way.
I feel like I have really gone through a transformation of some kind where I was so desperate several months ago to where everything just has a clear definition and I accept that.
Now if we could just get a clear definition on the rest of my problems. New Year's resolutions are around the corner.
A year ago if someone told me they were going to put gluten bread, cakes, and cookies in front of me I would have told them they were torturing me. Today, it seems so normal to give up so much. It actually makes me appreciate the fact that I am not adding all those extra calories on my behind.
Oh believe me I have found all different ways around that gluten torture to enjoy gluten free treats. I haven't lost much of any weight, in fact sometimes I wonder if my body has really readjusted and those calories I do eat are now just adding up some other way.
I feel like I have really gone through a transformation of some kind where I was so desperate several months ago to where everything just has a clear definition and I accept that.
Now if we could just get a clear definition on the rest of my problems. New Year's resolutions are around the corner.
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